Spring Break Shark Attack (2005) Reviews

• Not as bad as I expected

  vchimpanzee2005-03-22

  As the movie opens, three pretty young women are floating in the water on a raft. One disappears, and the water turns red ... Danielle wants to spend Spring Break in Florida. For one thing, she misses her friends Alicia and Karen, who went to a different college. Her strict lawyer father says no, but Danielle sneaks out anyway. The beach is filled with good-looking young people. Danielle meets up with her friends, and J. T. and his friend Max have a video camera and want to pick up girls. Danielle's brother Charlie, who is doing research for the local university, is concerned about the environmental effects of a new reef. His professor, after hearing him say sharks are likely to be a problem, reminds him of the boy who cried wolf. Nevertheless, Charlie tells his sister to stay out of the water. Shane wants to go to college to study boat building. His mother isn't making enough from their boat rental business, though this is the busy season. Joel Gately, one of the customers, is having financial problems which would be solved if Spring Break wasn't quite so profitable here. This would have been a perfectly good Spring Break movie without the sharks. Lots of gorgeous girls in bikinis (oh, almost forgot, there are guys with their shirts off). Wild parties with loud music. It's not always that exciting at first, but once the sharks really make their appearance, the excitement level builds. Again, it's not consistently exciting, but toward the end, I was glued to the screen. Shannon Lucio was good as Danielle, who and showed a lot of intelligence in the process of helping save the day for her friends and, later, for everyone. Riley Smith was also good as Shane, who also really knew what he was doing. Kathy Baker, as Shane's mother, did okay, but didn't really add that much for someone who is such a respected actress. Bryan Brown, as Mr. Gately, seemed to completely lack a conscience. There was some great underwater photography (related to Charlie's research, not the sharks), though it didn't last long. Consistency problem: the radio station started out as WZPP, then it was WZPZ, then WPZP. Makes you wonder what other problems there were. Regardless, I thought this was pretty good.

• Best movie ever.

  ibwa1@hotmail.com2005-03-21

  When I think of good films, several movies come to mind. But as of March 20th 2005, when I think of good films, I will now think of "Spring Break Shark Attack". At first I was skeptical, will there be Sharks? Will they attack? And if they do, will they attack during spring break? The answers came soon enough and they were "yes", "yes", and "yes". This movie is loaded with Hollywood Juggernauts such as Justin Baldoni, Ryan Brown, and Shannon Lucio. It was a star studded cast, and i'm sure Hollywood is going to take notice of the outstanding piece of history. Not since the legendary Corey Feldman took to the silver screen have I seen such outstanding performances. Three cheers all around, to every person who worked on this masterpiece, and for the first time in so long, made a true American classic. Score: 10/10

• Hysterically cliché ridden, awful acting, and bad dialogue

  johannap2005-03-21

  As a year round resident of Florida (one of the few under the age of 75), I have dreamt of spring breakers being eaten by sharks, lots and lots of sharks. My dreams were finally realized thanks to CBS finally bringing to the small screen a compelling story that needed to be told: "Spring Break Shark Attack." Simply put, this movie was hysterical. Yes, it was full of clichés, the worst acting this side of "Plan 9 from Outer Space", and terrible, terrible dialogue. Folks, the movie was named "Spring Break Shark Attack." (The name alone sends me into fits of giggles.) Were you expecting Martin Scorcese? Because of its God-awfulness, I can't remember the last time a TV movie made me laugh so hard. One can only imagine how good it would have been to see this monstrosity on a big screen.

• Low expectations & wasn't disappointed

  ninetyninedegrees2005-03-21

  I didn't expect much, and got what I expected. I can't believe this has 6 votes of a perfect 10. Was the cast and crew here on IMDb voting? There wasn't that much eye candy, although the HD broadcast was pretty good and Riley Smith is looking better than ever. There are a few minor technical flaws. For example, that was the strangest Florida coastline I've ever seen - complete with mountains, rocky islands, etc. It looked suspiciously more like Hawaii or Mexico. The only mountains I've seen in Florida where man-made ones in Disney World. Is it obvious I'm fishing for 10 lines here? This movie doesn't deserve 10 words, let alone 10 lines. Did I mention that Riley Smith is looking better than ever?

• as bad as it gets

  jeff-902005-03-20

  I knew it would be awful, but I thought maybe the camp value would make it funny enough to watch. Wrong. This is one where the IMDb comments minimum of 10 lines does nothing but waste disk storage someplace. No plot, no suspense, awful acting by young actors you've never heard of for good reason and old actors who used to have a career (Bryan Brown should have retired after the first FX). The so called effects are as lame as they looked on the previews. They throw in the standard teen romance that is as tepid and G-rated as possible. No chemistry, no heat, no point. No one is very likable, no one is unlikable either for that matter. The whole thing is like plain white rice. It's a 1, but I gave it a 2 because there was at least one girl in a bikini visible during 95% of the scenes.